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You are at:Home»Creative Expression»Self Worth for Women The Moment She Sees Her Own Value
Creative Expression

Self Worth for Women The Moment She Sees Her Own Value

Elif KoseBy Elif KoseAugust 29, 2025Updated:May 14, 2026No Comments5 Mins Read95 Views
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Most women have never truly been seen not in the way that celebrates who they are, but in the way they think they should be. And that’s where my work begins.

I’m extremely lucky. I get to combine my vocation with my avocation, my work with my passion. I specialise in headshot photography for women, and at the heart of what I do is this one truth: there is a moment, powerful and sacred, when a woman sees herself through someone else’s loving lens and finally recognises her own beauty.

That moment of recognition is what drives me. It’s what has always driven me.

Before I ever held a camera in my hands, I grew up on the shop floor of my family’s women’s clothing business. It was there, between racks of fabrics and the warm hum of conversation, that I witnessed first-hand how light, colour, and a few words of encouragement could utterly transform a woman’s sense of self.

moment

I remember one woman in particular. I’d suggested a piece of clothing I thought would suit her. She hesitated and said, “No, that’s not my colour.” But I gently encouraged her to try it anyway. When she stepped in front of the mirror, her face changed, she lit up. “I look fabulous,” she said, almost in disbelief.

That day I learned something that has never left me: how we think we look and how we actually appear to others are often worlds apart.

Years later, while training in photography in London, I found myself walking up and down Upper Street in Islington, portfolio book under my arm, approaching women with a question: “Would you like a free headshot at my new studio?”

You can imagine the expressions I received. Most of these women were mid-errand, weighed down by their to-do lists. Some instinctively clutched their handbags. But something beautiful happened after just a few minutes of conversation softening. They realised I wasn’t trying to sell anything. I saw something in them. Something they hadn’t yet seen in themselves.

That moment of trust still gives me goosebumps.

Looking back now, I can see that my earliest training wasn’t in photography school it was on the shop floor. Both spaces taught me presence. How to pay close attention. How to make someone feel completely at ease. The shop and the studio, really, are not so different.

moment

Women often tell me, “I’m just not photogenic.” And I get it — that doubt is real and valid. Then comes the list: My smile’s crooked. My eyes are uneven. My hair’s not right. I hate my nose.

But here’s what I know for sure: when a woman has a meaningful reason for wanting her photo taken when it’s about more than just a photo the magic begins. That deeper “why” pulls her forward.

Sometimes it’s a new job. Sometimes she’s coming through illness or heartbreak. Sometimes her children have left home, and she’s reclaiming parts of herself that were put on hold. Sometimes she’s simply ready to see herself again. And that moment? That’s where everything shifts.

One client once said to me, “I’ll never look as good as the women in your portfolio.” But great photos don’t come from luck, they come from intention. Photography, like most things, follows a recipe.

In my studio, I blend trust, a quality lens, soft flattering light, composition, colour, and gentle direction plus something even more important: time. My sessions last as long as they need to. Sometimes hours. Because real connection and real confidence can’t be rushed.

When all those ingredients come together, the results are breathtaking.

And so when someone says, “I’m not photogenic,” what they often mean is, “I’ve only ever seen photos of myself that were missing the right ingredients.”

I still think about the women who lit up in our Brighton shop mirror. These days, I just do it with a camera.

Diana Vreeland once said, “Use your flaws as your superpowers.” She turned Barbra Streisand’s nose and Mick Jagger’s lips into icons. What makes us different makes us memorable. Our uniqueness is our strength.

Sometimes the story behind a session is deeply emotional. Sometimes it’s celebratory. But always, there’s vulnerability. To show up fully, as you are that takes courage. And courage is the starting point for transformation.

What happens next is often unexpected. Women laugh. They tear up. They rediscover something forgotten. Some find a playful spark that’s been dormant for years. Others see qualities they’d overlooked for far too long. Some say, “I don’t recognise myself from that angle… but I like it.”

Many leave the studio walking taller not just because of the photos, but because of the experience. It’s not about changing who you are. It’s about reconnecting with who you’ve always been.

Reflecting on my journey, I see the golden thread. Every step from the shop floor to the city streets to the studio has been leading me here. My work isn’t really about photos. It’s about empathy, connection, and presence. It’s about respect.

It’s about helping you see yourself, truly see yourself, as the beautifully complex, one-of-a-kind woman you are.

And if you’ve ever looked at a photo of yourself and thought, That’s not really me, let me tell you, that’s not the end of your story.

The journey to seeing yourself fully is still unfolding.
And when you’re ready
I’d be honoured to show you what I see.

Author

  • Elif Kose

    Driven by her mission to reshape the way women perceive and assert their power, Elif doesn’t just talk about confidence she embodies it.

    Her story of personal and professional reinvention, from fashion designer to transformational confidence coach, resonates with those looking to reclaim their voice, purpose, and impact in a world that needs more empowered female leaders.

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Driven by her mission to reshape the way women perceive and assert their power, Elif doesn’t just talk about confidence she embodies it.Her story of personal and professional reinvention, from fashion designer to transformational confidence coach, resonates with those looking to reclaim their voice, purpose, and impact in a world that needs more empowered female leaders.

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