I can’t leave it behind or tell it to go on ahead without me. It’s permanently attached to my whole being. The funny thing is, I’m actually in charge of everything it does.
All I need to remember is to feed and water it, give it plenty of fresh air, dust it off, take it for a walk, love it unconditionally, and remember to breathe.
Scary thought, right?
I’m not the most confident person, but I’m stepping out of my comfort zone to share my story, and fingers crossed, I’m hoping to inspire you to be brave.

My Journey
Imagine you’re a small child and your dad’s in the Army, and every two years your family packs up all your belongings and moves to another town or country.
I was a quiet, shy child, and by my count, I went to about twelve different schools. I’ve probably been to every kind possible, infants, middle, primary, secondary, an all-girls school, and even a boarding school, for 42 days.
I was always the new kid on the block, having to catch up or sometimes repeat work. There are whole chunks of education I’ve completely missed out on.
At 15, we finally settled back in Worthing, West Sussex, and by that point I was completely “schooled out”. I was in another school uniform, all dressed in green, and didn’t really have many career options to choose from. I was literally on countdown to leave.
I remember leaving school on a Friday and starting work in a factory on Monday for £1 an hour, making big girls’ pants for M&S. And you know what? I loved it.
I was part of a team, and I had to learn to sew at pace. Time, quality and quantity were my new best friends. The more we produced, the more we earned, and that teamwork felt amazing.
All of my life skills were starting to come together. I can make friends easily, I can earn my own money, and I know I can work on my own and as part of a team.

Reinvention
Fast forward. I’m 39, working part-time in a school, happily married with two young children, a loving husband and a dog. Everything was fine, but something was missing.
I’d lost my sense of me.
I needed a hobby, something for myself. I looked at the local colleges. I knew I didn’t want to do cookery, pottery or flower arranging. I saw the reflexology course and remembered I’d had a taster session once and thought, that looks interesting.
Before I knew it, I’d enrolled in a reflexology course. All I needed was a notebook, pencil, a white tunic and myself.
It wasn’t until I sat in that classroom that it suddenly hit me. What are you doing? You hated school. I quietened my thoughts and thought, what could possibly go wrong?
The tutor opened by explaining the course was equivalent to an NVQ or diploma and “not for a bored housewife looking for a hobby”. My brain went into overdrive. What’s an NVQ or diploma? I haven’t even got a GCSE or any sciences. And how does she know I’m a bored housewife and need a hobby?
Then she asked us to stand up and say who we were and why we joined. One by one they stood up and said, “I’m a chiropodist”, “I’m a physiotherapist”, “I’m an osteopath”, and I want to add this onto my established business.
Cue panic.
It was suddenly my turn to stand up. I felt sick. I wanted the floor to swallow me. I felt like that frightened little girl again, trying to fit in.
I’m not sure what happened next, but something sparked deep inside me. I took a deep breath, reached out to my frightened inner child, pulled up my big girl pants, stood tall and said,
“My name is Debbie Stevens, and I’m that bored housewife. I’m here to learn a hobby.”
That was it. My superpower was out. I felt like Wonder Woman in those big girl pants.
I completed the course and passed with 98%. I’m so used to failing, and I’ve never reached a mark like that, not even for talking.
On July 4th, I left my part-time job to follow my dream. I had my very own Independence Day.
I’ve now been celebrating it for 21 years.

The Five Ways to Wellbeing
I live by the ✋ Five Ways to Wellbeing.
Connect – Ask yourself how you’re doing and engage with others.
Take Notice – Really listen to what’s happening inside your body and around you.
Be Active – You don’t have to get hot and sweaty to be active. Just keep showing up and taking part.
Keep Learning – Trying something new can be really good fun. Did you know massaging the tops of your fingers can help stimulate blood flow to your brain?
Give – Give yourself a break and choose kindness.
Wellbeing is for every body, any age, any gender, any culture.
Today
I run an established wellbeing events business delivering:
Workplace wellbeing days
School wellbeing sessions for teachers and pupils
Women’s pamper days, girls’ nights and retreats
Workshops that remind people how to rest, reconnect and recharge
Life has a funny way of testing how much we’re willing to grow, but it also rewards us when we take that first brave step. No matter where you are on your journey, it’s never too late to rediscover yourself, to start again, or to choose a little more kindness each day.
These simple yet powerful steps have guided me, and I hope they’ll inspire you too.
My biggest lesson? You can do it alone, but it’s much more fun when you work as a team.
Pull-Out Quotes
Pull Quote 1 (Opening Spread)
“This is my body and it goes everywhere with me.”
Pull Quote 2 (Mid-Article)
“My name is Debbie Stevens, and I’m that bored housewife. I’m here to learn a hobby.”
Pull Quote 3 (Closing Spread)
“You can do it alone, but it’s much more fun when you work as a team.”

1 Comment
Pingback: The true marker of a civilised society is how we care for our most vulnerable - Confidence