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She Who Chooses Both

adminBy adminAugust 29, 2025Updated:September 22, 2025No Comments6 Mins Read20 Views
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Do You Want to Be Part of This New Story?
By Marina Fernandez Julian
Releasing Growth. Inspiring Greatness.

The Dream That Wouldn’t Let Me Go

I used to dream of a world better than this one. A world where I didn’t have to pick a side. Where I could mother and lead, pause and perform, cry and still be seen as strong.

I imagined a life where I belonged in both my home and my calling, fully, without apology. That world? It’s no longer just a dream. It’s being built, quietly but fiercely, underneath the noise, the chaos, and the obstacles.

The only question now is:

Do you want to be part of this new story?

The World We Are Creating

In this world, we are no longer apologising for having a voice or for wanting more.

We’re done pretending to be good humans.
We are good humans.

Here, roles aren’t masks. They’re reflections of our truth.
We don’t need to work ourselves to exhaustion to earn worth.
Worth is already ours, even on the days we don’t produce, perform, or please.

Power isn’t something we reclaim. It’s something we share.

In this world, where the masculine and feminine meet in balance, there’s no need to dominate or disappear. No one has to fight to be heard, because they already are.

What It Takes

To live and lead in this new story, we need something radical.

A rise in collective consciousness.
Deep, personal growth.
Unshakable confidence.
And a quiet, fierce kind of faith, the kind that stands tall even when you’re misunderstood.

Especially when you’re misunderstood.
Which is often.

I Know This Path

I’ve lived the cost of not trusting my voice.

I’ve felt the sting of judgment when I chose to be both a part-time mother and a part-time entrepreneur. Too many times I’ve heard:

“She doesn’t really work full time.”
“She’s not really a full-time mum.”

As if choosing both made me less than either.

But here’s what choosing both actually looks like.

What Choosing Both Looks Like

It looks like I’m missing fun after-work drinks because the school run came first.
It looks like skipping early meetings, the ones that have the potential to bring good money to braid hair or find a missing football boot.
It looks like logging in at night after folding laundry and warming dinner.
Other times, it’s burning dinner because you’re deep in thought about a client’s session.
It looks like answering work emails while walking the dog.
It looks like building a business with one hand while drying big, fat tears with the other.
It looks like solitude.
It looks like money you didn’t earn because you chose presence.

It looks like gritting your teeth when other women say you’re a “kept woman” or a “bad mother” for missing the match.
It looks like joy and guilt, grace and grief and all before lunch.

And no one claps for it.

You don’t get applause for choosing both.
You get questions.

“Why don’t you go back full-time and hire help?”
“Why don’t you just focus on your kids until they’re older?”

Even women say it. With smiles. With labels.
“Pick a lane.”

But Here’s What I’ve Learned

Doing both isn’t a compromise.
It’s a calling.

It’s invisible leadership; the kind that fuels the next generation and redefines success.

For many of us, reclaiming our story begins in the kitchen, not just with food, but with presence, honesty, and the courage to ask:

Am I the driver of my life?

Too often, the answer is unclear.
We’ve been navigating from the passenger seat fulfilling roles while forgetting our essence.

But leadership, real leadership, begins there for some of us.

Leadership in the Everyday

Leadership isn’t a title.
It’s a way of being.

For women who raise a family and build a business, leadership is often invisible.
It’s found in bedtime stories and badly written pieces of papers.
It’s in the balance of intuition and responsibility.
It’s leading even when no one calls you a leader.

So to the women choosing both:

You are not lesser.
You are limitless.

To the ones juggling motherhood and mission:

You are not diluted.
You are devoted.

To the woman living in-between honouring her courage, her compromises, and her quiet power:

I see you.

Get Curious Before You Judge

To those judging from either side, full-time professionals or full-time parents; maybe ask:

What would it take to see someone else’s life as valid, even if it doesn’t look like your own?

Could it be that someone choosing differently isn’t rejecting your path, but honouring their own?

Instead of:

“She must not care enough about her kids,”

Try:

“She must be doing what she believes is best.”

Instead of:

“She’s not serious about her career,”

Try:

“She’s creating her version of success.”

Instead of judging, get curious and put yourself in their shoes.

To the Woman Who Chooses Both

I know your pillow has heard both your joy and your doubt.
I know you wonder if you’re doing enough in both places and fear you’re failing in both.

You’re not.

You’re weaving something new.
Something worth mentioning.
Something the world is already watching.

You are proof that it’s not the hours worked, but the love and integrity with which they’re lived that builds legacies.

You are not behind.
You are aligned.

And I think, too, of the women who believed they couldn’t choose both, not because they had children, but because they didn’t.

Women who felt judged for not becoming mothers, and so chose full-time careers not out of passion, but to justify their place.

And so I repeat the previous statement, Instead of judging, get curious and put yourself in their shoes.

Your Moment Begins Here

To walk this path, whether you are a professional or stay at home mum, have children or not,  you must know who you are, not your roles, not your to-do list, not the expectations placed on you.

You.

That knowing becomes your strength.
That clarity becomes your compass.
That soul-deep identity becomes the place where your true voice rises.

In a world obsessed with perfection and performance, choosing to live, lead, and speak from soul is revolutionary.

This is where your power lives.
Not in being louder.
Not in being tougher.
But in being real.

Speak. Write. Claim Your Space.

To the woman still afraid to be seen,
To the leader who has learned to whisper instead of roar:

Let this be your moment.

You don’t need to be fully ready. You only need to be fully you.

Because the world needs your voice.
And this new story, the one where you choose both is already unfolding.

For us.
For the generations to come.

Step in. Speak up. You already belong.

Want to Go Deeper?

 

🌐 Explore My Work:
https://marinazestforlife.com

🔗 Connect on LinkedIn:
https://www.linkedin.com/in/marina-zest-for-life-coaching-and-nlp-training-

Marina Fernandez Julian
NLP Trainer and Coach
Releasing Growth. Inspiring Greatness.
Your Help Towards Self-Leadership, Professional Growth & Richer Life Experiences.

 

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