By Lesley Thomas
Founder of The Money Confidence Academy
It starts in the quiet moments. A decision. A disappointment. A dream reignited.
And suddenly, the financial life you were living… no longer fits.
Maybe you’ve stepped out of a secure 9–5 to build a business. Maybe you’ve walked
away from a marriage that once felt safe. Maybe your children are grown and for the
first time, the question hits you. What do I want and how do I afford it?
These life shifts don’t just challenge our routines, they challenge our relationship with
money, self-worth and voice.
As a Money and Mindset Coach, I’ve spent years working with women at these exact
crossroads. Women who were the glue in their families, the backbone of their
businesses, the cheerleader for everyone else, except themselves. Women who
weren’t afraid of responsibility, but had never truly felt permission to take up space
Financially.
That’s why my work doesn’t start with spreadsheets. It starts with identity.
Because before you take control of your money, you need to take ownership of the
story you’ve been telling yourself about what you’re allowed to want, ask for, or
Become.
- Rewriting Your Money Identity
We’re taught to believe that money confidence means being good with numbers.
But money confidence is really about being good with yourself.
When a woman leaves her job, her relationship, or her long-held role in the family,
the shift is more than logistical, it’s emotional.
We internalise roles like provider, caretaker, or peacekeeper. So when those roles
dissolve, it’s not uncommon to feel lost, resentful, or ashamed, especially if money
feels uncertain. That’s where your voice comes in.
You have every right to define success on your own terms now, not someone else’s.
Whether that’s building wealth, becoming self-reliant, or simply feeling calm when
you check your bank balance.
One client I worked with had supported her husband’s career for 20 years, raising
three children and running the household. When they divorced, she told me, “I don’t
even know how to log in to my bank app.” Today, she runs her own consultancy and
is helping her daughter save for university. Her turning point? Choosing to stop
outsourcing financial confidence and starting to build it for herself.
- Five Practical Ways to Rebuild Financial Confidence
If you’re in a season of starting over, these steps can help you steady the ground
under your feet:
Step one: Take stock without shame.
Begin by reviewing your accounts, income, and outgoings, not to judge, but to
observe. This is information, not a character test. Knowing your numbers is the
foundation for making informed decisions.
Step two: Build a soft landing fund.
I encourage all my clients to create what I call a soft landing fund, money set aside
not just for emergencies, but to create a cushion of confidence during times of
change. It might be £500 or £5,000. The amount matters less than the intention. This
is money that says, “I’ve got me.”
Step three: Identify your financial saboteurs.
We all have unconscious patterns around money, avoidance, guilt, overspending,
undercharging. I use a tool called the Money Confidence Saboteurs to help women
see which patterns are keeping them stuck. Awareness is the first step toward
change.
Step four: Create your own definition of financial freedom.
Forget the Instagram version. What does financial freedom look like for you, in this
season? It could be paying your bills without anxiety, starting a savings pot, or
earning enough in your business to hire support at home. Your freedom is yours to
define and pursue.
Step five: Take one embodied money action every week.
Confidence doesn’t come from thinking. It comes from doing. That might mean
calling your bank, reviewing your pricing, having a conversation with your
accountant, or setting up an investment account. Small, consistent action rebuilds
trust yourself.
- Your Voice Is Your Greatest Asset
If there’s one thing I want every woman to know, it’s this…You don’t have to earn the
right to feel financially secure. You don’t have to wait for someone else to give you
permission.
And you certainly don’t have to shrink to fit someone else’s story.
You get to own your voice. You get to say, “This matters to me.” And you get to back
that statement with action, belief and boundaries.
I’ve seen too many women underestimate their potential because they’ve
internalised the idea that being good with money is for someone else. The
accountant. The ex. The business partner. The husband.
That story ends here. You don’t need to become a financial expert overnight. You
just need to decide that you’re willing to lead your life, your money, and your next
chapter, from a place of power, not fear.
- You Are Not Starting From Scratch – You Are Starting From Experience
The fact is, you’re not starting over. You’re starting with decades of wisdom, strength,
and resilience. Whether you’re launching a business after a long corporate career,
navigating single parenthood, or stepping into your own spotlight after years behind
the scenes, you’re already more equipped than you realise.
And with the right guidance, the right tools, and the right mindset… you won’t just
manage your money. You’ll model something powerful for everyone watching,
especially your children, friends and clients.
Money is not just a number on a screen. It’s a mirror. And when you own your voice
around money, you reflect back what’s possible for every woman who thought she
had to stay silent.
BIO:
Lesley Thomas is the founder of The Money Confidence Academy and a leading
voice in helping women transform their relationship with money. As a certified money
and mindset coach, host of theTop 5% podcast, Let’s Talk Money and More and
author of ‘Parents Let’s Talk Money – if you’re not talking to your Teen about it, who
is? ’ which is being published in July 2025, she empowers women to rebuild financial
confidence, especially through major life transitions. Lesley works with ambitious
women ready to lead with self-worth, not self-doubt.
www.themoneyconfidenceacademy.com
